Enchanting Moonlight
by Draco'sLoverr
Summary: Remus John Lupin.. a werewolf. Happens to be falling in love with his best friend. Finally complete! Thank you so much for reviews, follows and favorites!
1. Chapter 1

**Guys, I've taken a break from writing Drarry, and figured to try something new. So, Wolfstar it is.  
If you hate this, don't bother telling me, I really dont care, I want you guys to enjoy this, and I'm sorry for spelling mistakes and my shitty English.**  
**I dont own these characters, sadly, I wouldnt mind thou. But I dont. These characters belong to J.K Rowling.**

* * *

Sirius Black walked silently through the streets of Hogsmeade, he had just finished last transfiguration-class that day. He walked by every shop in Hogsmeade searching frantically for Remus, but he was gone, as usual. Sirius wondered where that dog had been all day.  
He stared up at the blue skies, a warm breeze came in from the west and took hold of his long hair. He should really have done something about the untidy nest of long hair that fluttered in all directions in the wind. But again, that long hair was helpful when he once a month accompanied Remus as a dog.

"Remus," he shouted into the air. "Where the hell are you?"  
No answer, as usual. Sirius guessed he was busy making out with some Ravenclaw girl somewhere.  
Sirius felt a twinge of envy. Towards the girl. He frowned. Why was he jealous of the girl? Haha! He thought. His mind was fucking with him as usual, which wasn't a shock. He smiled at the sky again and walked over to the nearest tree. He sat down and leaned against it. A sigh escaped his lips.

"Padfoot?" Asked a distant familiar voice  
Sirius opened his eyes to see who had disturbed him in the little nap he was about to consider doing.  
"No, he's not here," he yelled back when he saw that it was James who shouted at him.  
"Stop kidding with me! Have you seen Remus? "  
"I'm not kidding, and no, I haven't seen him today," he said, waving at James.

James smiled at one of the three best friends and walked towards him. He sat down beside him and grinned.  
"Why the grin?" Sirius asked, he really knew the answer to that when he saw James neck.  
A bright red lovebite were visible just above his tshirt.  
"Damn, James, why cant you transfer some of that love crap to me?" Said Sirius annoyed, yeah, it was pretty annoying that James always bragged about him and Lily. Was it that hard to keep it decent? Or shut up about it for more that a minute?  
"Haha, you'll do just fine Padfoot" he said softly, and stood up to leave.  
"Yes, like a dead cat" he replied acidic and closed his eyes again.

Sirius fell asleep there under the tree without thinking any further of anything at all, a lovely break from the otherwise messy brain of his. His mother had often wondered what went on inside his head, he was not like his brother Regulus at all. They were different as night and day. All were different from Sirius. The rest of the Black family didnt care much about other people's feelings, much less about blood-traitors and other non-magical people.

Sirius light snoring continued as a shadow slid across his face.  
"Hey, Sirius! Wake up!" Remus Lupin had seen him at a distance and had decided to wake him, he couldnt sit there all day doing nothing.  
"Remus, shut up, I'm tired," said Sirius in a grumpy tone. Remus sat down on the ground blocking the small strip of light that made Sirius face comforably warm  
"Hey! Is it possible to be a little friendly perhaps? "Remus asked annoyed  
"Sorry" said Sirius, he had not intended and insult him in any way. He didnt like hurting peoples feelings much, unless it was Snapes feelings.  
"Where have you been today?" Sirius asked him and looked at him, he looked calm, calmer than usual  
"Nowhere, really. Just hanging around hunting cats" he joked and patted his head.  
"Just relax, I know how your mind has been lately. You shouldn't worry about me" Remus smiled .  
"Okay, now tell me, anything new happened lately?" he asked trying to have a conversation, to keep himself from staring too much at Remus.  
"No, not really. I heard Snape was an asshole as usual and tried to get to Lily again, which resulted in a reorganization of his face" Remus laughed, James didnt like that sneaky Slytherin too much, just as the rest of them  
"If he tries to get Lily, he will end up in the infirmary again," Sirius joked, sneaking glances at Remus

His long brown hair was hanging down his shoulders in tangles. He breathed lightly and leaned back against the tree. He closed his brown eyes and grinned.  
"But how I will manage to stay another year here at Hogwarts, I do not know,"  
"What the hell are you talking about?" Remus asked, who apparently didnt have a single clue of what his bestfriend were talking about  
"I'm sick of all the love-nonsense now nowadays!"  
"You are like me, we'll survive somehow" Remus replied and sighed against his friend. He knew that Sirius was lonely, he'd like to do something about it, if he could figure out how to, or where to start  
"Yeah, I know. But seriously, not to be rude. James and Lily are constantly annoying me"  
"Hahah, Padfoot" Remus laughed "They seem to have planned the wedding and everything" he joked  
"Shut up, Luna" Sirius snapped

The two friends sat under the tree and grinned to each other a while before they found out that they should get into the castle and eat dinner with James, Lily and Peter. They grinned as they walked, talking about a certain Severus Snape

"You should have seen his face," Remus cried as he tried to keep himself from falling over.  
"It is often Slughorn takes points and gives detention!" said Sirius, laughing  
"He should have known better than to sabotage the whole class!"

They grinned and laughed further into the castle and stumbled through the doors to the great hall and found their seats next to James and Lily.  
"What have you done now?" Lily asked when she saw the grinning boys  
"Nothing, yet" they replied in unison, and grabbed a piece of toast.  
"Yet?" she frowned as she realized what they were talking about  
"Dont tell me this is another of your stupid ideas to get Severus to the hospital again?"  
"You're close this time" admitted Remus and nudged Sirius with his elbow  
"What do you say, Padfoot?" he smiled  
"Exactly" Sirius agreed and took a big bite of whatever food he had on his plate.  
"What has he done to you two anyways?" Lily continued, she tried to defend her friend as best she could.  
The boys ignored Lilys question and started eating in a furious pace instead.

Remus looked up when he was finished eating and stared at Severus Snape. He sat there at the Slytherin-table and looked relatively depressed. His greasy black hair hanging down in his eyes, he was reading a book. Remus had concluded that it was a collection of poems from a depressed Muggle-author. Poe or something.  
It was no wonder why that idiot was depressed if all he ever did was to read poems about death and murder.

"Oy! Remus! Move!" Sirius screamed into his ear  
"Uhh .. Sorry,"he said and jumped backwards.  
They walked together out of the Great Hall and on to the commonrooms. Sirius grimaced at the passing Slyhterins when they reached the stairs. They went in through the portrait hole after having discussed with the lady in the picture for a while. They had forgotten the password for the tenth time that week and the lady in the picture began to be mighty annoyed. Fortunately for them Frank Longbottom came up from behind. He grinned at them and said password. They went into the large, lighted commonroom and stopped at the stairs.

"Night Lily" said James and kissed Lily goodbye.  
"Night James" she smiled and walked up the steep stairs.  
"Damn, Jacob! How do you do that? "Sirius asked shortly after Lily had left them  
"The key is to be friendly" he grinned as he walked up the stairs to the boys' dormitory followed by Remus and Sirius  
"What a shame" Sirius sighed, "he's gone soft" and he nodded toward James and giggled.  
"It's called love, Padfoot" James replied and patted him on the back  
"You should try it sometime"  
"Rubbish" Remus shot in when they came up to their beds.  
"That's your opinion" said James as he changed clothes

20 minutes later light snoring filled the commonroom. The boys slept peacefully without a single worry.

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**There it is, chapter 1, once again I'm sorry if my English is bad, I hope you understood a bit thou. I have a feeling where this is going now :) Please dont be too harsh if you're reviewing :D**


	2. Chapter 2

Sirius woke up pretty rested the next morning. It was sunny outside, crystal blue sky as usual, he was going to get some homework done today. The History of Magic essay about hung over him like a black rain cloud. He sighed and sat up.  
"Whoa, are you awake now?" The voice belonged to Peter he sat and stared at him with peering eyes.  
"Mhm," he muttered.  
He glanced over at the bed next to him, Remus was still asleep, he snored lightly and murmured something in his sleep. James were accompanied by Lily, the flaming red hair of hers were scattered everywhere over the white pillow, it obviously tickled James nose because he was unable to lie still and turned his back to her to avoid getting tickled again.  
Sirius eyes slid back at the sleeping boy in the bed next to him. He looked peaceful as he lay, with one hand behind his head and the other under his pillow. Sirius forgot that Peter were watching him, he smiled at the sleeping Remus and grabbed the white shirt lying on the bed. He pulled it over his head and stretched simultaneously.  
James stretched too. He yawned, tired and kissed Lily's cheek.  
"Let me sleep, James" she said with sleepy voice and pulled the covers over herself again  
"Of course Lil" he said, and turned to Sirius  
"Breakfast?" He asked, nodding toward them  
Both Sirius and Peter nodded back and grabbed the rest of their clothes

"How about getting Lily to stop moaning in the middle of the night?" Sirius asked as they walked out of the living room  
"Haha, you're just jealous" grinned James  
"Jealous? Haha, no. Hey, it's okay that you're sleeping with her, but for fucks sake, keep it down? "  
James looked a little embarrassed, he studied the ground and his shoes the last few meters to the main hall to avoid strange looks.  
"I mean, it's not the first time you almost have been caught" said Peter as they took their seats. The blond boy had warned James and Lilt several times when the head boy, Lucius Malfoy decided to check out where the funny noises came from. James had just enough time to get Lily under the invisibilitycloak before Lucius' pointy nose rounded the corner and looked suspiciously at them  
"Exactly!" Sirius shot in. "So stop now, while you still can, or keep it quiet"  
James nodded and grabbed two eggs and a sausage and put food on his plate. He had no plans which involved stop seeing Lily, they just had to find a more private place. He grinned. Be quiet, yeah right.

* * *

Remus woke up to a Lily snoring in the bed next to him and found out that James and Lily apparently had been doing some sort of gymnastic exercise during the night. He grinned and laughed silently.  
He sighed. His stomach rumbled, he needed food.  
He grabbed a simple black shirt and some jeans. He yawned several times while he dressed. Before he went down, he checked his hair one last time.  
He stopped for a few minutes and let his fingers glide across the diagonal scar on his face.  
The transformation from being human to become a werewolf once a month wasn't exactly pleasant. He had been like this fro years. Since he was a little child. The scar across his face was barely visible, he got it when he was younger, he had scratched himself accidentally. At that time they did not have any pain medication. They had no such medication now either, just a few tablets which his mother had forced him to take when he was home because of pain and extensive wounds.

Remus stumbled tired down the stairs and out into the hallway. He smiled to the pictures on the wall. They smiled back and greeted him good morning.  
He took a deep breath and continued thinking. He wouldn't get up this early unless he had to do something important. He had something he wanted to tell his friends, which had irritated him almost a year. He had a small problem .. He was gay. He had fought the feeling for years. He had know for a long time thou, he had never told anyone, not a living soul. Not even Sirius. He was ashamed. He didnt know why he had picked this day. Suddenly he doubted this was a good idea afterall.  
Remus Lupin, a gay werewolf. He sighed again and walked along towards the great hall. Towards his judgement, or, that was what he thought.

He came into the great hall and saw his friends talking to Frank Longbottom, they discussed something important. They had to, no one smiled  
"Hey," he said nervously and sat down next to Sirius  
"Hello" they answered back and smiled  
"You see, Frank has just told us something you too should know about" said Sirius when Remus looked at them.  
"Which was?"  
"I'm gay" Frank said quietly, "I just had to tell someone" he smiled a nervous smile and walked back to his place a few meters from them.

Of all the people who heard this conversation, there was one who found it rather juicy, he could't bare not ruining this.  
It was always the same. Lucius Malfoy.  
"Are you next then, Lupin?" he said with a grin and turned to his friends.  
By Remus' shooked face Lucius figured out that he was, and of course he screamed it out.  
"Did you hear me? Lupin is gay!"  
Remus turned slightly pink and turned around, this wasnt the way it was meant to come out. Not at all.  
He wanted to dig a hole and just disappear from the face of the earth, just sink deeper down into his own humiliation and forget everything.  
He thought he had ran away but when he came to his senses, he discovered that he stood still. Its hard to run when your feet is nailed to the ground.  
Come on! Feet! Don't fail me..  
Finally.  
He turned around once more, looking desperatly at Sirius before he stormed out of the great hall and towards the bathrooms.

* * *

Sirius eyes went black, Malfoy was gonna pay for that! He stood up quickly and ran after Remus, screaming his name and asking him to wait, he didnt. He just rushed towards the bathroom.  
When Remus reached the bathroom Sirius could hear a door being slammed shut and locked with all the locking spells in the universe.  
Sirius sat down and leaned his back on the door, he knew Remus was sitting a few inches from him on the other side.  
"Remus" he whispered  
He heard sobs and cries  
"W-what d-do y-you wan-t" said a crying Remus trying to control his sobs  
"Are you okay?" Sirius regretted the question the second it escaped his lips, of course he wasnt okay  
"Do I fucking s-sound o-okay?" Remus sobbed from the other side of the wooden door.  
"No, Rem, you dont, but please, let me in. You know I'm your best friend, I wont make fun of you like that bloke Malfoy! You know me!" Sirius talked fast, he needed to find out if Ramus was more or less okay than he sounded.  
"I know, just leave me alone" Remus answered, his voice was more distant now, Sirius figured he had walked over to the sink. He was right, seconds later he could hear the water being turned on.  
He took the chance and stood up.  
"Alohomora" Sirius muttered. The door opened. Remus wasn't that good with locking spells.

Sirius walked over to Remus shivering body, the pale boy tried to catch his breath in between all the sobs escaping him. Ha sank down on the floor and cried.  
"H-how lo-ong have th-e-ey known?" he asked looking up on Sirius, eyes filled with tears  
"Know about what? What do you mean?" Sirius didnt understand why Remus had ran off in the first place  
"Th-that I-Im gay" Remus said the last word as it was poisoned.  
"What?"  
Remus sank further down on the floor when he understood that no one knew. Well now they did. He was a fool.  
"Oh no.." he sighed and pulled his hair  
"What?!" asked Sirius more worried than ever before "What is the matter?"  
"I basically told everyone by the expression on my face that I'm gay, they know, they wasn't supposed to know in the first place. But now they do.. How the hell am I supposed to handle this?"  
"Remus" said Sirius taking his hand to make him stop pulling his hair out.  
"You're not alone" he didnt say anything else, nothing more, just those three words.

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**That was the 2. chapter. Im still sorry for my bad English.  
In this I made Lucius ruin a potential conversation between james, Sirius, Peter and Remus because I loathe him. I really do.  
And I wanted to make Sirius more protective. Afterall, Remus is not alone in this. Not at all :)**


	3. Chapter 3

Remus sat quietly on the floor in the bathroom with his hands in Sirius'. He didn't know what to do.  
"Remus" Remus looked up when Sirius said his first name, it was like a whisper.  
"What?"  
"It's okay, Remus. You're my best friend, I do not care if you're gay or not. I love you for who you are. Honestly? You didn't actually think I would abandon you, did you? Remus, you are a minority in a minority. You are unique! I .. " _love you.  
_Sirius stopped and looked at him. He loved him, he couldn't tell him, he couldn't risk the friendship, but the thing he could do, was to support Remus more than ever, maybe he would understand Sirius feelings for him after a while  
"We are friends to the end of time" he smiled  
"To the end of time" Remus repeated and smiled back.  
"What do you say to get out of here? You are hungry "Sirius pulled Remus up on his feet and smiled.

Remus didn't care about the looks he got when they went back to the great hall to continue the breakfast.  
James, Lily and Peter just smiled as they entered the Great Hall, they knew not though some of Lucius' outburst fifteen minutes earlier. Remus' heart beat so fast when he sat down he thought it would jump out of his chest and land on the table in front of him.  
"Moony, just ignore that bastard Malfoy" said James, smiling. "He's a jerk"  
"I'm trying" said Remus. "And, I know he's a jerk"

Sirius patted him on the shoulder and grabbed an apple.  
"Whatever it is, we're here," he said, nodding towards James and Peter  
"I know that, thank you" Remus said, staring into his coffee cup.

The five friends consumed the rest of the breakfast and went their separate ways, well, James went with Lily to the girls' dormitory, Peter went to sleep, Remus and Sirius went to collect books, parchment, quill and ink.  
They went smiling towards the tree down by the lake and spread the books on the grass in front of them, trying to figure out where to start

"I heard Narcissa tell someone about what we're supposed to brew in Potionsclass tomorrow" Remus said to break the silence  
"And that was?" Sirius asked, with his nose buried deep in the "History of Magic"  
"Some stupid lovepotion" he shuddered. "Nonsense!"  
"I bet your shirt that James takes half of it and seduces Lily again," Sirius pout over the edge of the book. As he shook his head incessantly. His hair started to get really annoying  
Remus sniffed the smell of him, there was something about it that made him smile. Sirius smelled safe. _I want to feel your arms around me, I want you to be mine, I want you to belong to me, and me alone, I need you  
_  
He sighed and turned his attention to a book. Homework .. total waste of time.  
He tried hard to read for nearly twenty minutes he gave up and sneaking glances at the boy next to him.  
Sirius sat with the thick book in her lap and looked lost.  
The long hair shielded his expression in his grey eyes. The smell of him was still left in Remus. He couldn't help it. He loved him

Finally a thought struck Remus, he was madly in love with his bestfriend. He shook his head quietly, he couldn't risk their friendship, not now. And besides, Sirius was straight.  
"Remus, you're staring " Sirius said and met his gaze  
"Erm .. sorry. Got lost in my thoughts "Remus looked down at his book again.  
_  
_ _I got lost in my thoughts of your hands tihing me, your lips on my skin. I'm in love with you Sirius Orion Black._

"Thinking of something special?" Sirius asked, smiling  
Remus stared up at the sky and sighed  
"It's a full moon soon" he shuddered. Full moon meant a painful transformation, two days in constant pain, in the Shrieking Shack  
"You know, I could come with you, help you get through it, I hate to hear your screams.."

_I want to help you, I want to be there so you know Im there for you, I want to hold you when you're you again, I want to kiss you and tell you everything will be fine.._

"Over my scarred dead body!" Remus looked at him "I scream because I don't have anyone to bite or attack, so I scratch and bite myself, I cant accept the thought of me hurting you. Im dangerous Sirius"  
"Remus, I hate to hear you being in pain" Sirius repeated.

_I love you, I want you to be safe.  
_  
"I know Sirius, I just cant risk killing you"

_If I did I couldn't possibly live with myself, I love you._

They had so many unexpressed feelings. Remus wanted to tell Sirius how much he loved him, just as much as Sirius wanted the same. Sadly both were under the impression that it would ruin their friendship.

Remus and Sirius walked back into the castle before dark and turned in their essay's about Magic History.  
They both went to bed. Remus slept peacefully dreaming of Sirius and they day he would tell him his feelings. In the bed beside him Sirius had the same dream. They loved eachother, and they would soon have to tell the other.  
Love is one of the strongest feelings in the world.  
Remus John Lupin would notice that the very next day in Potionsclass..

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**Sorry for a rather short chapter. I have big plans for the next one, and Remus' transformation is soon coming. I hope you like my story :) I have put a lot of effort into this to make it better :)**  
**Please review :D**


	4. Chapter 4

The next day when he walked into potionsclass and smelled the aroma that had filled the air, Remus thought he had gone mad, not just Marauders mad, but actually insane.  
He smiled as he went over to his desk, a bit confused he turned to James and asked  
"Why does the classroom smell of Padfoot?"  
James smirked knowingly and pointed to the cauldron at the front of the classroom.  
"Amortentia. It smells like your favorite smell." He smirked at the werewolf. "Is there something you want to tell me, Moony?"  
Remus sighed and leaned over to James whispering in his air  
"I may or may not have a small crush on Padfoot"  
James looked at him and smiled.  
"You may?" he blinked and stared down at the table.  
"Okay, okay.. A huge one.." he sighed and watched the boy whom they were talking about enter the classroom.  
"Don't tell him"  
"Not a word" James smiled and nodded. He knew very well that his two friends were in love, it was kind of obvious to him. He had known a while, but decided to keep his mouth shut, he didn't want to ruin anything between them.

Sirius walked swiftly over to the table where his best friends were, trying not to smell the air. It smelled like wolf.. It smelled like Remus. He sniffed once and felt like screaming. God, he loved that smell.  
«Morning» he smiled to his friends and threw his book on the table  
"You're cheerful, something happened?" James looked at him with a grin on his face  
"No, nothing special, I'm just ridiculously happy" the grin on his face were bigger than ever, Remus knew it was genuine. He couldn't help but wonder why. What was the reason?  
Sirius sat down on his chair thinking.. nothing made sense. He loved Remus, Remus was gay, which meant he was able to love him back. But the thing he couldn't understand was that he couldn't be gay. Or could he? He had already pissed off his family, they had blasted his face of the family-tree, disowned him, they couldn't hate him more than they already did.  
He sighed and looked down on his potions book.  
He looked over at Remus making sure no one saw him and sighed silently. Remus ran a hand through his brown hair, he was confused. Obviously by the potion they were supposed to be brewing. Draught Of Living Death.. as usual! Why couldnt Slughorn make them do something interesting for once?  
Sirius sighed once more and shakes his head. I want to get out of here!

30 minutes later he rushed out of the class and towards the dorms. He needed to get some sleep before the next class. He walked up the stairs taking off his extremely tight tie at the same time. He went headfirst into a bedpost.  
"Fuck!" he sat down on his bed and rubbed his head. Ouch..  
"You know, if you calmed down while trying to get rid of your tie you might have escaped that one"  
Sirius turned to the left and saw Remus face grinning at him.  
"Hey, Moony" he said still rubbing his head  
"You okay?" Remus tiled his head down and looked at him  
_No, I'm fighting against myself, over you.._  
"Yes, just a scratch"  
"Okay, now, I think you should get some sleep, you look terrible, no offense. But yes, sleep. You need it, I'll wake you up in thirty minutes so you won't get late for class" Remus smiled at him. Sirius grinned back.  
"Thanks Moony" he said and pulled the covers up.  
Sirius closed his eyes and sighed peacefully.

_His mind was filled with sounds and images. Sound of a wolf howling.. The howling soon developed into horrible screams. He recognized the voice but couldn't place it. Suddenly an image of a wounded Remus crossed his mind. He had scars running all over his body, a deep wound on his left arm. Blood was dripping down on him. He tried to stop the bleeding but he was pulled away by an unknown force, Remus disappeared. His body fell to the ground and faded slowly into nothing but fog  
_  
"Stop! NO!" he screamed.  
"Sirius? What the?..» Remus grabbed his hand and squeezed it.  
«Whats happening?»  
Sirius sat up and tried to clear his sight.  
«Umm.. Nightmare» he blinked several times and tried to regain his sight. He saw a blurry sight of Remus sitting on his bed looking worried.  
Sirius grabbed his left arm and looked at it.  
"What are you doing?"  
«Checking something» Sirius answered and shook his head.  
«You are acting weird.. Is everything okay, Padfoot?»

_No is bloody hell not okay.._

«Bad dream» he sighed and reached for his shirt. He stared out the window. The moon was almost full now.. The stars were scattered around it. Stars..  
«Why didnt you wake me?» He asked when he realized he had forgotten class  
"You needed sleep, I figured to just let you rest, you didn't miss anything" Remus smiled and looked out of the window too.  
His sigh made Sirius realize the date. The 21st. Remus would become a wolf tonight.  
«Moony, you need to get to the Shrieking Shack. Come!" Sirius took his hand and dragged him out of the drom and down to the Whomping WIllow, down in the tunnel leading to the Shrieking Shack.  
James and Peter were supposed to follow but Sirius knew he couldn't risk getting them. Remus needed to get away fast.

"What about the others?" asked Remus twitching in pain as the moon rose higher to the sky.  
"No.. time" said Sirius running still holding Remus hand.  
"Come on!" he pushed Remus down the tunnel and made him go faster.  
Remus was twitching as they reached the end of the tunnel. Sirius dragged him further up the rotting stairs in the Shrieking Shack. Remus needed to be safe. As safe as it gets.

Sirius just had the time to change into a dog before Remus forgot who he was. Remus seemed to remember him as a dog, he couldn't risk being a man, Remus would kill him.

* * *

The full moon emerged from a cloud and shone through the broken window, and Remus knew that there were no way back. Never a way back

"No. ..! NO! Please! Please.." he cried out in the night, like many times before.

His screams turned into growls. His hands extended, he threw his arms around himself and scratched his own back. He couldn't bare the pain. All the bones in his body grew within him. He felt his spine grow longer. It felt like it was going to erupt out of his neck. His ears grew longer and moved up to the top of his head. Remus' feet ripped open his shoes as they grew.  
Long claws stretched out on the floor.  
He scratched his chest in pure fury, he needed to get the pain away, like many times before he scratched himself, leaving deep wounds marking a trail of blood as he tried to hide from the moon in a dark corner. He fell to the floor, trying to make the pain go away, his body wouldn't listen to him. He growled and dug his claws into the rotting floor. Splinters of wood flew around his head as he tried to dig his way out. He wanted to scream for help, for something or someone to help him.  
He howled again as his tailbone grew longer and stretched out behind him. He was immediately covered in rough, dirty, grey fur. His teeth got sharper.  
He screamed once more as his head expanded. he was now a wolf, there were no more senses of reality, just pure rage and fury against everything.  
The screams were now howls of pain. He took a careful step out on the moonlight and howled at the moon.

* * *

**Im sorry if my descriptions suck, but face it, Im not a werewolf. I hope. I just tried to describe it as I would have felt it. a big**

**AOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUHHHHH to you :)**


	5. Chapter 5

Having to watch the one you love struggle through hours of pain, never ending, constant pain is like .. well, it can't be compared to anything. Sirius stood nailed to the ground behind a rotten wooden door. Many of the planks in the door was gone, kicked loose. And there were lots of bite marks on the frames. Remus ..  
He stared at the figure howling at the window. The otherwise straight and strong back of his were covered with deep bleeding wounds.  
The blood ran in streaks down his back and dropped down on the dirty floor.  
Drip, drip, drip .. the sound was about to drive Sirius crazy. All he wanted was to protect Remus from pain. He couldn't do anything. He just stood there, if he moved Remus would smell him and probably kill him. It was a risk by standing where he stood too, but he didn't care.

Remus stood up from the floor and looked around. He always ended up here, he didnt know why. He was in pain. As usual.  
He wanted to bite someone. Now.  
Remus turned around to see a small shadow on the floor.  
He growled and started to circle around it, only to realize it was his own. He howled annoyed and looked out of the window.  
If only he had something, someone to ease the pain. He was a wolf, wolf didn't have friends, they were hated. He had been hated since he was a little wolf. No one had liked him.. Well, someone did, he didn't remember who. But he knew that there was someone. Or he hoped.

That someone was closer than he thought. Sirius' heart had skipped eight beats when Remus had jumped around. A split second he thought he had been seen, he partly waited to be killed and partly waited for Remus to recognize him. Which would never happen. Remus was capable of killing everyone now, even his best friend. Sirius' eyes found Remus once more before he backed slowly out in the hallway. He couldn't bare the sight anymore. He needed air, clean air. Not air that smelled like blood, Remus' blood.  
Sirius didnt go.. He lingered for some reason.  
Scars  
White stripes covering the parts of Remus' body that wasn't covered in deep wounds. He hesitated a bit too long.  
Remus looked like he had caught his scent and turned around quicker than expected  
Sirius jumped around and ran for the stairs.  
Remus stopped in the hallway and howled. His howls were soon answered from the north. Sirius didn't even know what that meant. Was he going to be followed by a pack of werewolves? No.  
He ran for the tunnel and reached it just in time. His black tail disappeared through the hole the same second as Remus came out of the Shrieking Shack.  
He looked around a minute before he headed for the woods. Not knowing where or who he was, he needed to bite someone, it had been years. He had kept still for years. But he didn't get any further. He felt a weird feeling in his legs and back. Like someone had hit the back of his head. He collapsed on the grass. The green were soon covered in red blood.

Sirius continued out of the tunnel and into the castle, frantically panting and running towards the infirmary.  
He almost collided with a shocked Madame Pomfrey.  
"He- he's bleeding out" he panted.  
"How bad?" She asked when she got the clue of what Sirius was talking about.  
"I don't know, I didn't see much, just that he is weaker, and he is loosing blood. A lot"  
"How long is left of the cyclus?" she asked again, but she already knew. "30 minutes, , and be careful, he might wake up"  
Sirius very well knew the risks. He had been doing this for a while now.

He hurried out of the castle and down the tunnel once more, looking to every side for possible threats. The tunnel was about to collapse anytime now. He needed to fix it, he couldn't have it collapse over him and Remus.  
When Sirius got out of the tunnel he was more dirty than ever. He walked over to Remus but stopped a few feet from him. He placed himself with the wind, his scent followed the wind over to Remus and he stopped completely for a few seconds to look for movements but the werewolf didn't move as much as a single muscle. Sirius stood and watched closely for five more seconds before he began to unbutton his shirt.  
He walked closer to Remus, and at the same minute his tail grew shorter. The dirty grey fur followed next. Sirius had to turn away when he saw the wounds. Remus back was sliced open. The deep wounds were filled with dirt and grass. Sirius had to get him to the infirmary quick. He wrapped his shirt carefully around Remus back and lifted him up in his arms and began the walk back to the castle.  
He walked fast but carefully. He didn't want to cause Remus any more pain, walking carefully through the hallways to the infirmary where Madame Pomfrey waited for them.

"Oh dear" She said when Sirius removed his shirt exposing Remus damaged back.  
Sirius carried Remus over to one of the beds and held him while Madame Pomfrey stitched his wounds. Towel after towel were soaked with blood as she moved from wound to wound. Picking out several pieces of dirt and traces of rotten wood  
"He must have been.." Sirius started but he couldn't finish the sentence, seeing Remus in pain were to much for him.  
"Hush, he'll be fine" the old lady stretched out her free hand and touched Sirius cheek "You should go and get some sleep"  
"No! I'm not leaving him!" Sirius said looking desperately at the witch. She couldn't throw him out!  
"I understand your concern, but you really have to go" she said and ignored his begging  
"Please.." Sirius tried once more, looking at the witch with all the concern and fright he could manage to but in one stare.  
She didnt say anything for several minutes, in the end the just nodded and looked at him  
"30 minutes, but then you have to go to your dorm" she said and left the infirmary.

Sirius climbed up in Remus bed, under the sheets carefully not to hurt him. He couldn't stay away anymore.  
Carefully he put both his arms around Remus injured body and moved his head to his own shoulder carefully planting one single kiss on Remus lips.

* * *

**Here you go :) Sorry for taking so long, hoping you think its worth the wait**


	6. Chapter 6

Remus woke up the next morning to find a sleeping Sirius by his side.  
"You finally understood it, didn't you?" He whispered carefully and tried to stretch the last tiredness out of his body. He growled in pain and remembered the night before.  
_Moony.. you have a problem. _Remus said to himself  
_A big problem, if you slip once when he is around, just once you might end up killing your best friend and the love of your_ life.

Remus looked at the sleeping Sirius. He looked soo peaceful, not a thing in the world could harm him, well the true reason for that was Remus. He'd curse anyone that tried to harm him. Remus turned around and carefully crawled under the covers again.  
He slept for about 20 minutes, then he was woken by a sleepy voice.

"Remus?" He turned around and met Sirius gaze.  
"What?"  
"You look terrible"  
"And good morning to you too, you know I'm a wolf, I'm supposed to be ugly" Remus laughed and playfully punched Sirius' shoulder.

_You're not ugly.. You're actually the most beautiful person I've ever seen. Inside out.._

Sirius was in deep thought again, thinking of how to tell Remus he loved him without making it come across wrong. He didn't want to seem like a needy, clingy dog. Not at all, he needed to do this right, and at the right time, whenever that was.

"What's on your mind?" Remus asked looking at him a bit worried. "Something wrong?"  
Sirius smiled at him.  
"No nothing is wrong, I'm just thinking"

_Just tell him, don't be a coward. It's three words, you already know he is gay, and you know he has a crush on someone. What could go wrong._

It was a bad idea to ask himself that, because the moment anyone say or even think those words, everything that can go wrong goes wrong. It's just how it is.  
Sirius really tried to convince himself to speak the truth. Him and Remus wasn't able to hate another so that would never happen.  
He might get the shock of this life, and avoid him for a day or so, but nothing more serious.

"Remus.." he started waiting for Remus to look at him when he did he continued  
"I.. I.."  
"You what?" Said Remus with a grin on his face which made the last tiny string of courage disappear from Sirius heart.  
"I.. I'm hungry" he wanted to hit himself, I'm hungry? That's as far from what he intended to say as possible!

_You're a moron! Pathetic! It's three damn words! 'I love you!' You obviously manage to think them why not say them!  
_  
He clenched his fists in anger under the covers.  
"You're always hungry Padfoot" Remus said and rose carefully from the bed trying not to rip off the bandages covering his wounds.  
"I'll get you some food"

Sirius grabbed his arm carefully pulling him slightly backwards.  
"Moony? Do you really want to enter the great hall looking like you've been eaten by a shark and been spit out again?"  
"No, not really" Remus said and smiled, "I couldn't risk scaring a heartattack on our dear headmaster could I?"  
Sirius smiled back "Exactly, we might try that thou, 1st of April next year!"  
"You stay here, don't move, and try not to bleed all over the floor, you need all your blood!"  
"I'll do my best!"

Sirius made his way through the crowd gathering outside the great hall. He didn't feel like causing attention today to he hurried down the corridor to the kitchen, where the house-elves had some food for these sort of cases.  
He greeted a small house-elf when he walked through the door and immediately headed over for the cupboards.  
Placing a piece of toast on a plate, alongside some fried eggs, bacon and beans. Remus was always hungry after some nights in the Shrieking Shack. Sirius grabbed a red apple for himself, having a loud discussion with himself inside his head. He was literally shouting to himself.

_Tell him, just.. tell him!_

Sirius walked back into the hospital wing still having the same discussion with himself, the same words over and over again, said by the same voice, his own. His head did make him want to go insane sometimes, it would be easier to explain. Hearing voices is never a good thing, even for him.

"Okay! I'll tell him!" Sirius shouted..  
"Tell me what exactly?" Remus asked from the bed looking suspicious.  
"Um, nothing special" Sirius lied, avoiding eye-contact with Remus. Sirius was a bad liar. He never managed to lie in front of Remus  
"Sirius, I've known you for years, I know when you're lying.."  
"Ok ok!" Sirius admitted, "I'm lying" He sat down on the floor and met Remus' gaze. Took a few deep breaths and sighed.  
"I love you!"

Sirius didn't have time to react before Remus sat on the floor in front of him. He smiled. Well it was more of a grin actually..  
"Why are you grinning?"  
Remus didn't answer. He just took Sirius hands in his and looked at him.  
After a few minutes he finally opened his mouth.  
"Really?"  
"What do you mean really?! Of course I love you! I can't even-"  
Sirius didn't get to finish that sentence before Remus lips touched his. Light. Like feathers. Feathers dancing over his lips, gently.  
Remus knew what to say, he had always known. Ever since their 2 year. He loved him. How could he not? Sirius was his best friend, but something more was in the air. Something lasting. He hoped

"I love you too, Padfoot" Remus said when they pulled apart.  
"Remember the potions-class where we had the task of brewing Amortentia? I went insane"  
"Why?"  
"The classroom smelled of you" Remus said and looked at him once more before pulling his face in for another kiss.  
They both knew.  
It would always be the two of them. Always

~x~


End file.
